Rocky Mountain Beehog Institute · Staff Directory

The Research Team

Colorado's only dedicated beehog research unit

The Institute operates out of a small fleet of field stations across the Front Range — chosen, according to internal records, for "good light, good crumbs, and minimal swatting." The core team has logged a combined total of "a lot" of beehog-hours, and remains the closest thing the species has to dedicated representation.

M

Madison

Species & Subspecies Specialist

The first call when a new beehog shows up and nobody can agree what kind it is. Madison can reportedly identify a Cloud Beehog from a Tree Hog at forty paces, in fog, and has never once been wrong about a Pointy/Stuffed Beehog — though she admits "Internet Beehogs all kind of look the same."

Field office: Colorado · Status: on-call during peak season

X

Max

Staff Veterinarian

Handles anything "broke" — a slightly bent wing, a stuck stinger, a beehog that's "just having a day." Known for a gentle bedside manner and an unusually high success rate with Cloud Beehogs, who Max describes as "good patients, very chill, smell faintly of ozone."

Field office: Colorado · Status: on standby for emergencies

C

Crew

Field Biologist

Spends most of the season out in beehog territory, tracking nesting patterns and confirming new sightings. Crew is responsible for most of what's currently known about beehog family units, monogamous pairings, and the ongoing mystery of what exactly Cloud Beehogs are emitting. ("Still unknown. Still studying it.")

Field office: Colorado · Status: in the field most of the season

Madison Max Crew Porter Jenny Riley SUBSTITUTE FIELD TECHS — STEP IN AS NEEDED

FIG. 2 — INSTITUTE STAFF STRUCTURE

On-Call Substitutes

When the core team is stretched thin during peak Beehog Season, the following field techs rotate in to cover sightings, basic ID, and the occasional massage-bite incident report.

All staff verified · RMBI